026: The Right Balance of Freedoms & Limits

Children need both, freedoms and limits. Freedoms without limits create chaos. But too many limits lead to unmet needs. How do we get this right?   It can be tricky to navigate the new way we build relationships with our children, especially as we become more aware of their rights and needs. So is it OK to say “no” to your child and how many times? How to stay clear of overindulging? The right balance of both freedoms and limits not only helps our child develop, it also builds our relationship with them.  Freedoms without limits create chaos in the families and anxiety for children. Too many limits with barely any freedoms leads to unmet needs. When the child’s needs are not met they either withdraw or become aggressive. It is important to get a balance of both.   What does the right balance look like?   Think "reasonable" and you will be on the  right path. The balance is built on the needs of the child and the needs of those around the child. Your child does have a human right to getting their needs met, and so when it comes to their needs, it is wise to say yes and to allow for conditions that will meet that need.   We are not setting limits on our children’s needs. We only set limits on their wants — the way they want something to happen is negotiable. We are in charge of that.     Sign up here for the Emotionally Intelligent Parenting training.   Host: Julia Pappas, Psychologist & Parent Coach More info at theparentingpresence.com