TLP391: Bet On Yourself with Lon Stroschein

The Leadership Podcast - A podcast by Jan Rutherford and Jim Vaselopulos, experts on leadership development - Wednesdays

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Lon Stroschein, a bestselling author, spearheads the "normal 40" movement, guiding individuals to reclaim life control. His journey from the corporate world to a more fulfilling existence addresses challenges of midlife change, focusing on financial security and self-image. Lon advocates introspection before career shifts, emphasizing courage in starting anew rather than quitting. He urges exploration of passions, even those seeming destined to fail, as they might hold true passion. Lon's trajectory, from executive coaching certification to discovering his love for coaching, signifies his transition. He highlights external triggers for life changes, financial concerns, marital agreements, and the importance of communication and guidance. Additionally, his own experience stresses the significance of attending to loved ones amidst corporate demands. Key Takeaways: [03:00] Lon shares the biggest fear a man can have before dying. It is when you have everything materially but do not have fulfillment in life. He stated that he started to discover what road he wanted to take when he realized what life he can have to fulfill his passion. You might have things that you are doing, but are not sure if that's the thing you really want to do for a lifetime. Lon also shares that discovering your path comes from your gut but at some point, it won't be easy to do. By doing what you want, you might also need to leave something behind and become someone else and bet on your new career, defining it as a trade because you don't know what amount you will receive after giving something.   [08:56] He is a successful professional, but he shares that he found himself questioning the meaning of his well-established life. Despite a great job and accomplishments, he felt a lingering emptiness during his daily routine. As he drives to his office in his car, he often wonders if this was all there was to his next 15 years. Lon also discusses that he retreated into self-reflection, wrestling with gratitude for his achievements and the yearning for something more because of his urge to passion. The story unfolds as he navigates this internal journey, seeking meaning beyond the checkboxes of success. [12:55] In sharing his experience, Lon highlights two major hurdles in making the tough decision to leave a stable job. First, there's the financial challenge, where individuals have to consider risking the income they've come to depend on, often feeling a responsibility to their family. The second hurdle revolves around the carefully crafted professional image, encompassing business cards, office titles, and social media presence. He also shares that transitioning from a well-defined role to uncertainty means not just risking financial stability, but also challenging the identity built over the years. Making this leap involves trading the security of income and a familiar image for the uncertainties of the unknown. [19:46] He emphasizes on commencing with clarity and engaging in profound conversations with oneself, family, and friends to understand personal identity and potential. He stated that starting something aligned with your envisioned future before quitting is the optimal strategy, although he acknowledges that his journey involved quitting first. Lon shares the trigger for change often surfaces when the Sunday evening pit in your gut becomes a persistent indicator that there might be a better path forward. He advises slowing down, earnestly exploring potential futures, and identifying endeavors worth investing time in. [27:44] Lon shares that he conducts weekly "ramble" sessions on their website, engaging in one-hour conversations with people who sign up. They ask a set series of questions, particularly focusing on the emotions participants are experiencing. Many express feelings of being on autopilot, frustration, control, uncertainty, stress, annoyance, isolation, and a sense of being stuck. He mentions that participants share their desires and life situations, leading the individual to pose a critical question about what their spouse wants for them, not from them. This often uncovers assumptions and prompts a realization that they haven't discussed their future with their spouse.  [29:29] He recalls countless instances when he was asked to do something, responding with a casual "maybe," but deep down had no intention of pursuing it. Lon shares the realization he had with regard to the importance of aligning actions with their passion and mission emphasizing the need to show up for the "maybe" moments, acknowledging that it's a sufficient starting point. By showing up, you can explore whether the idea is worth pursuing or if it needs to be discarded. There should be excitement and enjoyment in embracing the possibilities that a "maybe" holds, they encourage others to give it a chance and experience the thrill of uncertainty. [31:49] Lon shares a powerful personal story in his book. While on the brink of celebrating a significant professional achievement, the sale of their company, a critical family crisis unfolds. His daughter reaches out for help due to suicidal thoughts. This is when Lon realized that it is important to balance work achievements with a family crisis and the need to prioritize familial connections and be attentive to subtle calls for help within one's household, even amid professional pursuits. By this, he aims to inspire readers to reassess priorities and recognize the significance of family well-being amid career pursuits. [43:52] Closing Quote: Remember, be miserable or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice. - Wayne Dyer Quotable Quotes: “A certain number of years is not a prerequisite to knowing that this isn't where your future is.” “Go beyond business.” “The hardest professional decisions you make in your life is to leave what you've become great at and take a bet on yourself for what you want to live as.” “This is key- two things, it's not going to solve itself and nobody's going to show up and fix it for me.” “You will have to leave something behind, lay something down and become someone else.” “Take a chance or a bet on yourself in a new path - all of that is a trade.” “Get to where you are by intention, hard work, and by all plans.” “Talk to someone before you feel like you just can't take it anymore, and you have to trade.” “To inspire change, you have to share deeply and intimately of things that you've experienced, endured, lived through, and learned from.” “Find someone who's done it and ask them to talk.” This is the book mentioned in our discussion with Lon Stroschein: Resources Mentioned: The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Lon Stroschein LinkedIn | Lon Stroschein Website | Lon Stroschein Twitter |  

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