Understanding Codependency: How to Love without Losing Yourself w/Michelle Farris

Setting boundaries is a huge part of taking control of our lives, but doing that can be ridiculously difficult if we're codependent. The only problem is, many of us don't know if we fall into that category or not.   Despite codependence being a buzzword we're hearing a lot at the moment, many of us are still unsure about what exactly codependency is. So, what is it?   Could we be codependent without realizing it? Is there anything we can do to break the cycle of people-pleasing for good if we know we're in the habit?   In this episode, psychotherapist Michelle Farris shares the tell-tale signs of codependency and what to do about it!   Three Things You’ll Learn in This Episode What codependency means At its core, codependency is a relationship pattern where we focus on other people's best interests at our own expense. While it's perfectly normal to make sacrifices for loved ones from time to time, with codependency it becomes the rule, rather than the exception. How to tell the difference between being helpful and being codependent There will always be times we don't feel like doing something, but when we really don't want to, we'll feel it in our gut. If we're ignoring our intuition because we're worried about someone else's reaction (and if we're doing it repeatedly) we're not just being helpful, we're breaking our boundaries. Why codependency breeds resentment When we set unrealistic expectations of people-pleasing for ourselves, we start believing the people around us should be acting the same way without ever communicating that to them. This only leads to bitterness in the long term, and it could all be avoided in the first place.   Guest Bio-   Michelle Farris is a licensed psychotherapist in San Jose California. In her private practice Michelle found her sweet spot in teaching relationship skills that are easy to implement fast. She believes that being a good therapist means doing your own work. Her guilty pleasure is a Venti latte from Starbucks!   To connect with Michelle, go to: https://www.counselingrecovery.com/  https://www.facebook.com/counselingrecovery  https://www.pinterest.com/mshellmft/   https://www.instagram.com/counseling_recovery/  https://www.twitter.com/mshellmft/  www.linkedin.com/in/michellefarrismft/  https://www.youtube.com/c/MichelleFarrismft    To get a copy of the The Codependency Workbook - A Guide to Being Your Best Self, visit: https://www.counselingrecovery.com/online-courses/the-codependency-workbook