How To Have A Thriving Relationship with a 1 | Ep. 385

In this episode we have Beth McCord joining Dr. Kim to talk about How to Have A Thriving Relationship with an Enneagram 1. For the next several weeks Beth will be breaking down some real, practical tips for being married to each Enneagram number.    If you are married to a 1 this is YOUR episode. But even if you aren’t married to a 1, we know you will find this episode helpful in learning more about your 1 friends. Part of loving people is knowing people. So use this series as a tool to know your people better, understand them deeper, and love them better.    Beth McCord founded ‘Your Enneagram Coach’ and has been an Enneagram speaker, coach and teacher for over 17 years. She is seriously the best of the best so we are so blessed to have her share her time and expertise with us.    Having been trained by the best Enneagram experts and pouring hundreds of hours into advanced certifications, Beth is leading the industry in simplifying the deep truths of the Enneagram from a Biblical perspective. Beth does one-on-one coaching, in-person events and workshops and online courses. She also offers training and support for those interested in becoming an Enneagram coach. So make sure you give her a follow on Instagram @yourennegramcoach and check out her website yourennegramcoach.com for more great info.    We pray you enjoy learning more about 1s in this episode!  NOTEWORTHY QUOTES  “We try to make Type 1’s understand that their inner critic is not the Holy Spirit.” - Beth McCord “Type 1’s long to hear, ‘You are good.’ Christ satisfies this longing.” - Beth McCord “When Christ comes into a Type 1’s life there can be a peace that this person has never experienced before.” - Dr. Kim Kimbelring  “For Type 1’s it’s all about ethics, morals, procedures, and things being done the ‘right’ way.” - Beth McCord “Understand that the Type 1 has a harsh, condemning inner critic that is constantly berating them.” - Beth McCord “1’s value problem solving over emotions, so it’s better to wait to approach a Type 1 until your emotions are at a more balanced place.” - Beth McCord “It’s important to give your Type 1 time and space to process.” - Beth McCord “Type 1’s have a hard time being spontaneous because it feels irresponsible to them.” - Beth McCord -”It can be helpful to ask your Type 1 to rank how loudly their inner critic is berating them on a scale of 1-10 so you know how to approach them.” -Beth McCord “Hard as it might be to believe, most of the time Type 1’s are offering criticism and correction from a genuinely helpful place.” - Beth McCord “If you’re married to a Type 1 you have to accept who they are, not discount their inner critic, but learn how to come alongside them and encourage them toward Christ.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling  “It’s not that the inner critic is inherently bad, it’s just that when we allow the inner critic to go offcourse and let it misalign with the truth of the Gospel, that is not going to be helpful to the Type 1 or anyone else they are around.” - Beth McCord “Encourage a Type 1 when you see them succeeding and doing well in what they are doing.” - Beth McCord “The list of things that need to be corrected, improved, and fixed never ends for a Type 1.” - Beth McCord “The core weakness of a Type 1, resentment, is actually underlying sorrow.” - Beth McCord “Type 1’s are striving for perfection when Christ is already perfect for them.” - Beth McCord “A healthy Type 1 has to learn to set boundaries for their inner critic.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling “Type 1’s have a gut instinct and wisdom of knowing what is morally right.” - Beth McCord “Type 1’s are amazingly detail-oriented.” - Beth McCord “Type 1’s see the world as it is and they want to improve it.” - Beth McCord “It’s like Type 1’s can remember what earth was like before the fall and they want to do everything they can to bring us back to that perfect place.” - Beth McCord   SPONSORS   Thank you to Groove Life for sponsoring this podcast episode! Groove Life has the Groove ring that is the world's first breathable active ring that is not only super comfortable but functional. Born from need, GROOVE raises the bar on traditional silicone, activewear rings with its flexible material, patent-pending, inner breathable design, and beautiful colors. You can use the code “awesomemarriage” for 15% off your order!    RESOURCES Find everything you need at becomingus.com! Including the course for YOUR marriage’s Enneagram combination. Beth & Jeff have a ‘Becoming Us Course’ for each couple type combination. That is 45 courses customized for each couple type combination. They go deeper into the “dance” (relational dynamics) and give you practical resources and insights to help transform your marriage.  Buy ‘Becoming Us’ today!  Not sure what your Enneagram Type is? You can take the free assessment here! Also be sure to take the FREE MARRIAGE ASSESSMENT here.  Learn more about each type with this FREE SUMMARY!  Check out more great insights by Beth on her blog.  Discover your Enneagram number with the Discovering You course. Already know your Enneagram Type? Then it’s time to take a deeper dive with the Explore You course.  You can get some one-on-one coaching with Your Enneagram Coach here.  Do you or your spouse struggle with confidence? You aren’t alone if so! Snag our new resource Confidence Busters & Boosters to help cultivate confidence in each other and build up your marriage.  Become a Marriage Changer and receive some sweet exclusive benefits. Learn more here! Sign up to get Dr. Kim’s One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day via email, text, or podcast here!